Holly

Much like with The Knife's utterly bizarre 'Christmas Reindeer' last year, I couldn't help but a get an old-school rush of Christaversary spirit (yes, in spite of the gloomy subject matter) when I stumbled across this Lightspeed Champion song on YouTube. I'm a sucker for the indie Christmas track, and that's no lie.

Merry Xmas, one and all!

Paul Rudd For PM. (Or, 'You Just Can't Make This Stuff Up, Vol. I'.)

Did anyone else see CNN's silly season uber-gaffe yesterday? (Seriously, a quick Googling indicates that this one went under the radar.)









Now, Jonomatopoeia may been imbibing freely on the night of November 24, but he was lucid enough to note that the outcome of the night was a much more expected KEVIN Rudd victory. It seemed that lucidity only settled upon the CNN opium den a couple of hours after the report went live, and a hasty correction was HTML'd.

But imagine if Paul Rudd was our PM. He does double-denim-clad belligerence so well. (Shades of Latham here?)

And that's not to mention this star turn as a madly leering 16-bit videogame enthusiast:





At the very least we would have had a more rousing victory speech.

Snoop Dogg + Vocoder x Ironic VHS Video = ...

... pretty win, it seems.

But peep this:

I'm gonna take my time / She gon' get hers before I / I'm gonna take it slow / I'm not gonna rush to stroll, so she can get a / Sensual seduction-duction, so I can get a / Sensual seduction-duction.
(Dogg, 2007)

Cf.

Dre got some bitches from the city of Compton / To serve me, not with a cherry on top / 'Cause when I bust my nut, I'm raisin' up off the cot / Don't get upset girl, thats just how it goes / I don't love you hoes, I'm out the door.
(Dogg, 1993)

Ironic flourishes? A desire to meet the needs of a sexual partner before his own are addressed? Will Snoop Dee-to-tha-Double-Oh-Gee have to turn in his gangsta badge and gun?

Before we go overboard, though, it should perhaps be noted that the non-MTV-friendly version of the song is actually called 'Sexual Eruption'.

It Is Now

I can't take credit for this -- the neologism's all Jelly.

But now at least it's been deemed legit by the Urban Dictionaryscenti. (It's just a shame the site approves so much vomit.)

Another few (hundred) thumbs up and it'll be a Word of the Day contender. Go get 'em tigers!

Peace and fucking. Believe.

The One With The Interactivity

This, completely random, character wants to befriend me on Facebook. Going by the profile-morsels supplied below, what would you do?

(Y/N? -- I'm totally selling this as a programming concept to MTV, right?)

Supplementary question: 'Is Jono a wanker?'

On Smut

Re this post straight outta Crack Province, I've compiled a list of Linguistics terms that sound smutty. Do enjoy:

Lunacy

I saw a man walking a llama down Elgin Street tonight. No, really. The moon was hanging low and full with pre-eclipse anticipation and this man’s llama was listlessly grazing on a patch of grass next to Beaurepaires.

A llama – doubleyou-tee-eff? I know.

Polyvinyl Pyrrolidone

This was thrown into sharp relief last night when I stood too close to a mantlepiece candle at a party last night and my hair caught fire.

The first I knew of it was a wild buzzing coming from the back of my head. My initial thought was that a cicada or locust or (I’m clearly not much of an entomologist) similar critter had landed on me. Thankfully, the chums I was talking to by the fireplace realised that I was not, in fact, dealing with an arthropod interloper, but a follicular conflagration, and exercised a measure of haste in dealing with the burning PVP.

A lesson learnt. Or something.

Cruciverbalism

A crossword in the upcoming Farrago, compiled by Jelly Hands (A.K.A. Gillian Terzis) and me.

Click the image to get lexical.

Enjoy.

Revenge of the Nerds

I'm strangely obsessed with watching South Korean Professional Starcraft matches at the moment.

Is it the mystifying need for the sedentary 'athletes' to wear big-name sportswear brand tracksuits? Is it the fact that it's so irresistably Revenge of the Nerds that these guys have made a lucrative career (pun; intended) from Starcraft and are now improbable pin-up boys? Is it the fact that I'm an inveterate geek?

I'm going for a 'yes' to all of the above.